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  “What did you do Christmas Eve, Jaleb? Huh? What did you do?”

  “I told you that I hung out with Rodney and Keith during the holidays. Why?”

  “Lying ass!” Jacob screamed at him, punching him in the face.

  Jaleb didn’t have the heart or the desire to hit Jacob back. He knew he deserved it. “Jacob, I don’t know what the hell you’ve been smoking, but you need to stay off it.”

  “I’m talking about Nia. You know Nia, don’t you? Neena’s twin that you thought was Neena when you fucked her on Christmas Eve.”

  Jaleb went to the freezer, took out a cube of ice, sat down at the dinette table, and glared at Jacob. Fuck it, he thought to himself. I’ll just tell him everything and get it over with. “Okay, Jacob, I’ll confess.”

  Jacob let out a wicked snicker. “You have no choice but to confess.”

  “It was all a huge misunderstanding,” Jaleb said nonchalantly, rubbing the ice on his eye before it could bruise.

  Jacob couldn’t believe his nerve. He’d rushed home from the open house and scanned through his email until he’d located all the emails Nia had alluded to. “A misunderstanding. I Can’t Wait To Work Your Body Over? What a lame ass poem!”

  “I thought it was rather poetic myself.”

  “And the punk ass picture of you in a ribbon?”

  “There is nothing punkish about that picture,” Jaleb lashed out defensively.

  “Why? Why would you do something so stupid?”

  “I was bored. I realize I should have just emailed Neena and told her that you were out of town.”

  Jacob balled his hand into a fist, ready to strike again. He didn’t because he knew Jaleb wouldn’t hit him back so it wasn’t an even playing field. “Yes, you’re damn right! You should have!”

  “It’s just that the pic you have of her as your screen-saver at the office is super hot and I just couldn’t resist the urge to take a dip in the pool.”

  Jacob had to agree that the picture in question was hot as hell. He sat down at the table facing Jaleb. “I can tell that poem took all of two seconds to make up, but where the hell did the picture come from?”

  Jaleb chuckled. “Denae took that one last year when we were still seeing each other. Remember, you told me that you’d talked about sending her a freaky picture?”

  Jacob couldn’t helped but be somewhat impressed at Jaleb’s resourcefulness. “So you dug that one out and sent it, pretending that it was me?”

  “Exactly!”

  Jacob grew angry all over again. “Jaleb, you have done some low down dirty shit over the years but this is really unforgivable.”

  Jaleb’s temper was raising its ugly head also. “Get off your high horse. This isn’t the first time we’ve played this game.”

  They had, in the past, played tricks on a couple of sisters. Nothing of that magnitude though and it happened when they were much younger.

  “This is the first time we’ve played the fuckin’ game when I wasn’t in on it!” Jacob reminded Jaleb. “The really messed up part is that Nia was really feeling me, rather you, that night.”

  Jaleb realized that something wasn’t adding up. “How do you know? For that matter, how’d you find out about all of this in the first place? I thought you were kicking Neena to the curb?”

  “That’s the most fucked up part of all! You knew you didn’t fuck Neena and you led me to believe that she was a hoe just so you could save your own ass.”

  “Who told you all of this? Neena?”

  “No, Nia. She showed up at my open house today, thinking I was the man she spent Christmas Eve with, and confronted me about the situation.” Jacob felt like getting up and throwing the chair he was sitting in against the wall, but managed to stay in place. “She said that Neena does know about it, though.”

  “This is a big mess!”

  “Yes, it is a big mess, and it’s all your fault!”

  Jaleb wasn’t about to be the fall guy. “Hold up, now! This is just as much Nia’s fault as mine. She was creeping behind her sister’s back just like I was creeping behind yours.”

  “That’s makes the two of you the perfect match.”

  Jaleb grinned, reminiscing about the glorious night he’d spent with Nia. “We were damn near perfect that night.”

  “You like her, don’t you?”

  Jaleb took his time before replying, “As much as I’d like to swear up and down that it was only sex, I have to admit that it was special.”

  “From the way she was acting today, it was special for her too.” Jacob got up, ripped open the case of beer, and yanked one open. “You ruined a good thing for me, Jaleb, and I’m not sure I can ever forgive you.”

  “Why does it have to be ruined?”

  “Excuse me?”

  “Neena’s mad because she thinks you slept with her sister and then started ignoring her because of it. But you didn’t sleep with Nia. I did.”

  “Like tell me something I don’t already know.”

  “I don’t see why your thing with Neena can’t be salvaged.” Jaleb was trying to make amends with his twin. His dirty deeds had been uncovered so there was no logical reason for Jacob not to be happy if Neena was the woman that could do it. “Why can’t it be salvaged?”

  Jacob took a swig of his beer. “Good question.”

  Chapter Twelve

  Nia sat at the dining room table, rubbing her stomach, and yelled into the kitchen. “Momma, this country fried steak and cornbread is delicious!” She glanced across the table at Neena, who had refused to say more than two words to her in weeks. “Isn’t it, Neena?”

  Neena rolled her eyes at Nia. “Don’t talk to me.”

  “Neena, we can’t not talk to each other forever. We’re twins. We live in the same house. This is ridiculous.” Nia realized she was talking too loudly and adjusted her tone. “Besides, do you really want Momma to jump into the middle of this and get all into our business? She’s going to know something is wrong if you don’t stop this nonsense. It was bad enough that you left me at home and drove over here separately.”

  “It would serve your ass right if Momma found out. Remember, I’m not the one that did anything wrong here.”

  “I know that, but I’ve already apologized a dozen times. What else do you want me to do? Kiss your feet? I’m not thrilled at the prospect but, if it will get you to drop this, I’ll kiss your damn feet.” Nia could tell she was getting to Neena because she was trying to suppress a smile. “Your crusty, ashy, look like you’ve been driving a car in Bedrock feet.”

  Neena threw a dinner roll at Nia. “Oh no, now don’t go dogging my feet.”

  Nia giggled. “You know it’s true. You can use an entire bottle of lotion on them and they’re still ashy. You need to look into a podiatrist or something because those Asian-owned, fly by night commercial nail salons you keep going to aren’t helping. Don’t they make you soak your feet in the same water as their other customers? That’s just straight up nasty. Some eighty-year-old woman’s fungus is probably causing your feet to dry up like that.”

  “Get off my feet already,” Neena said snidely. “Don’t make me turn into Ms. Thang and start on your flat ass.”

  “My ass is not even flat.” Nia got up from the table and turned around, modeling her rear end. “Your butt might stick out an inch or two more than mine, but that’s it and it’s only because you lost your virginity before me.”

  Neena couldn’t prevent her laughter any longer. She chuckled and Nia joined her. “That is the silliest thing I’ve ever heard. I lost my virginity like two months before you did.”

  “What are you girls talking about?” their mother asked, returning from the kitchen with a piping hot apple pie. She loved cooking Sunday dinner for her daughters and looked forward to it every weekend.

  “Nothing, Momma,” Nia answered, retaking her seat. “Just talking period.”

  “Good. I was about to get concerned. You two seemed uncomfortable earlier. Is something wrong?”
/>
  Neena decided to respond since she was the one that showed up with a funky attitude. “No, Momma. Everything’s fine. I was feeling kind of down because of my job.”

  Their mother shook her head. “Again? Neena, no matter how much they’re paying you, get out of there if you’re not happy.”

  “I second that,” Nia agreed.

  Neena looked from one of them to the other and came to a long overdue conclusion. “You’re both right. I might have to take a pay cut, but it would be nice to be stress free for a change.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  ONE MONTH LATER

  “Guess what?” Neena said anxiously, coming into the house and tossing her briefcase on the armchair.

  The only problem was that Nia said, “Guess what?” at the same exact time, jumping up from the sofa, grinning from ear-to-ear.

  Nia was disappointed and anxious at the same time but conceded to her twin. “You can go first.”

  “No, you first.”

  “No, you because I’m sure my guess what is more exciting than your guess what.”

  Neena shrugged her shoulders. “I doubt it but, anyway, listen up. You might want to sit down because this is going to shock you.”

  Nia plopped back down on the sofa. “Okay, I’m sitting. Hit me with it.”

  “I finally did it. I quit my job.”

  Nia was stunned. “You’re kidding!”

  “No, I really did.”

  “You go, gurl!” Nia exclaimed. Neena sat down beside of Nia and slapped her a high five. “So, what are you going to do now?”

  “You’ll never guess.”

  “I’m not even about to try.”

  “You remember Tai from high school?”

  Nia’s eyes narrowed like she was deep in thought. “Yeah, didn’t she move to Charlotte or something?”

  “Yes. I ran into her a couple of weeks ago in the airport and, since both of our planes were delayed, we decided to grab some coffee at Starbucks and catch up.”

  “That’s cool, but what does that have to do with what you’re planning to do?”

  “Patience, Sissypoo.” Nia rolled her eyes, hoping Neena would get to the point quickly so she could reveal her own news. Neena continued, “Tai is in public relations now and owns her own firm. Business is booming and she’s taking on too many clients, but refuses to turn anyone worth the effort away.”

  “Who are her clients?” Nia asked, unimpressed. “Charlotte’s not exactly Hollywood.”

  “You’re so silly. Movie stars and writers are not the only people that use public relations specialists. Charlotte is growing by leaps and bounds in big businesses and then there are the various athletic franchises.”

  “So her clients are big business men and athletes?”

  “Yes, mostly athletes.”

  “Fine athletes?”

  Neena giggled. “Yes, Sissypoo.”

  “Does she represent Phillip Keller?”

  “From the Panthers? I’m not sure, but she might.”

  “Gurlllllllllllllll, if she could hook me up with him, I’ll kiss her feet. Not your feet, but her feet because hopefully hers aren’t jacked up like yours.”

  Neena slapped Nia gently on the arm. “Can I finish?”

  “Go ahead.”

  “I’m going to become her partner. Her full partner. I have some money saved up and Tai said if I buy out a certain percentage of the firm, then it’s on.”

  “You doing public relations? Your background is in sales.”

  “Sales. Public relations. It’s all about making people comfortable enough around you to do some business.”

  “True and you are the master of that.” Nia did admire Neena’s sales skills. Girlfriend had it going on and could sell sunglasses to a blind man.

  “So what do you think?” Neena asked, uncomfortable with the silence that ensued.

  “I think it’s a wonderful idea, but…”

  “But what?”

  “Sounds stressful. Isn’t the whole point of this exercise to get the stress out of your life?”

  “This is different. I’ll basically be setting my own hours, I’ll get to go to a lot of sporting events and hang out in the skyboxes rubbing elbows with bigwigs, and I won’t have to be flying across country half the damn year.”

  “But didn’t you run into Tai at the airport?”

  “Yes, but she was taking a rare trip and it wasn’t business-related. She’s seeing a brother in Houston and was flying down to surprise him for his birthday.”

  Nia, satisfied with Neena’s answers, threw her arms around her sister’s shoulders and gave her a bear hug and kiss on the cheek. “Neena, I’m so proud of you. I never thought you’d actually do it. I wish you the best.”

  “Thanks, Sissypoo!”

  “Now, I do get to hang out in some of those skyboxes with you, right?” Nia asked jokingly. “If you come falling in here all the time excited about meeting this person or that person, I might get a tad bit jealous.”

  “Don’t worry. I’ll hook you up, even if I only have one ticket. We’ll wear the same outfit and take turns going in and out if we have to.”

  That caused memories of Christmas Eve and the depressing aftermath to come flooding into Nia’s head. She still felt extremely guilty about what she had done. “Neena, once again, I’m sorry for pulling that switch on Jacob.”

  Neena waved off her comment. “Forget about it. He’s history. Nothing and no one comes between you and me. I’m sorry I even treated you badly. Everyone makes mistakes. Even me from time-to-time.”

  “Dang, and all this time I thought your ass could walk on water.”

  They both laughed.

  “Now, what’s your guess what all about?” Neena inquired.

  “I almost completely forgot. I was so caught up in the moment.”

  “Get uncaught and spill the beans.”

  “You’ll never guess who called here today?”

  “Hmm, Publisher’s Clearing House to let me know I won ten million dollars?”

  “No, they always come knocking at the door with balloons and television cameras. Besides, you’ll never win that shit. I don’t know why you bother entering.”

  “Okay, since it wasn’t them, could it have been Prince calling to tell me that he’s finally come to his senses and wants to become my sex slave.”

  Nia smacked her lips at Neena. “You got jokes!”

  Neena shrugged. “It could happen.”

  “Neena, you met Prince in passing one time after a concert when we were fifteen. You have a better chance of winning that damn Publisher’s Clearing House than him calling here.”

  Neena realized that Nia did have a point. “I give up then. Those are the only two things that could happen that would rock my world right about now.”

  Nia started giggling and almost catapulted off the sofa. “How about the Anissa Brand show calling and asking us both to be on the show?”

  Neena threw her hands over her mouth. “Us? On a talk show? You can’t be serious. Stop kidding.”

  “I’m dead serious. They want us on the show next Monday. They’re willing to pay our plane fare to Chicago, put us up in a hotel, and cover all expenses if we’ll do it.”

  “But why the hell would they want us on a talk show?” Neena wasn’t buying it. It didn’t make any sense for a talk show, especially the number one show in the country, to call them up. “Our lives aren’t exciting enough to be on a talk show.”

  “Humph, tell me about it. I was wondering the same thing until they told me the topic of the show.”

  “What is the topic?”

  “Identical twins, what else?”

  “So we’re twins. That doesn’t mean we have something to sit on stage and talk about for an hour.”

  “Our segment will be more like ten minutes because we won’t be the only twins on the show.”

  “But what on earth will we talk about, even for ten minutes?”

  “What it’s like being a twin, do we
have ESP when it comes to each other, silly shit like that. And ummm…”

  Neena didn’t like Nia’s hesitation. “And ummm what?”

  “I wasn’t going to tell you this part because I know it’ll make you nervous. You’ll have to find out sooner or later though.”

  “Find out?”

  “The exact title of the show is America’s Sexiest Twins. They’re having a contest.”

  Neena thought she was hearing things. “A contest? Oh, hell naw! You mean we have to wear bathing suits and do a talent portion and all of that?”

  “Yeah, all of that.” Nia held her breath, hoping Neena would at least consider it. She didn’t have to wait long for an answer.

  “No way, Nia,” Neena said defiantly.

  It’s time to go into whine mode, Nia thought to herself. “Neena, don’t do this to me. You know I’ve always dreamed about my ten minutes of fame and, now that the time has finally arrived, you’re not messing this up for me.”

  Neena shook her head in dismay. “But a contest is so demeaning. It’s like saying, ‘look at our asses and vote for us.’ That’s so shallow.”

  “Well, according to you, your ass is all of that anyway so that shouldn’t be an issue,” Nia said sarcastically. The whining wasn’t working so now it was time for bitch mode. “Neena, don’t make me get nasty. I can’t do this without you. All I’m asking for is one day. More like two or three actually, but just one favor.”

  “The Anissa Brand Show, huh?” Neena asked, smiling a little. That was her favorite talk show. “That’s my girl. Remember when she was on that show Ghetto Blues when she was a kid.”

  Nia looked at her like she had completely lost it. “Of course I remember. Ghetto Blues was better than Good Times, What’s Happening, and The Jeffersons all rolled into one. I wonder what happened to the other cast members.”

  “Who knows? I heard Gary Lindsey, the brother that played Tyrone, got locked up for dealing drugs.”

  Neena got up and headed into the kitchen to get a Mystic out of the fridge. Nia followed her saying, “Damn shame so many child stars grow up and lose their minds.”